I know you've all been waiting patiently to know what the results were from our FET #4. Before I explain why I've waited to say anything I'll let you know I am pregnant and 10 weeks along. This is a miracle in and of itself. In my last 3 transfers I've miscarried at 6.5 weeks. (Well last one was a blighted ovum). I'm taking it day by day and grateful every day we get in this Pregnancy.
I wanted to wait to post anything because I am anxious, nervous, and honestly I'm scared. I really hesitate to even post it now, I'm still not out of the clear and it hardly seems this is real and hasn't really sunk in. It's weird knowing I'm pregnant but not feeling like it's real yet. I'm just waiting for the bad news. I'm not trying to be a downer but after so many losses it's hard to get your hopes up and then dashed so to protect myself I have this guard up.
I haven't had an excited I'm pregnant feeling yet and maybe I won't at all during this pregnancy and that's ok. I'm not going to feel guilty about it. It's just another way to try and protect myself if things go south.
I also have wanted to wait because I know how hard pregnancy announcements can be and am sensitive to those who are still in their infertility journey. Many of those who are in their own journey have also experienced: disappointments, pain, loss, heartache, grief but hopefully our journey gives you Hope that God knows best and is over all. I know that whatever comes in the future with this babe is His plan and I trust Him.
So we cheated and did an at home test the day before we had first beta HCG (pregnancy blood test) which was 10 days after transfer 2/27. My result was 203.6 and they didn't retest for another week because they said the number was strong. So at 17 days post transfer I did another blood test and my HCG was 7088. I was relieved. As last time my numbers weren't doubling like they should.
I had my first u/s at 6 weeks 5 days and I was anxious to see if any baby was in there. I asked to only have an abdominal u/s as I usually spot after the transvaginal ones and didn't want to risk anything. It was wonderful to see and hear the heartbeat. The baby was measuring 6w+1day and heart rate was 110.
Had second u/s and again requested Abdominal--at 8weeks 5 days and I was even more anxious for this one. Like to the point I couldn't stop crying all morning. It was bad and I wasn't sure I wanted to know. But again all was well baby was measuring 8weeks 2 days and heart rate was 168. I cried when I heard that glorious heartbeat. We got to even see a little baby movement. Such a cute little gummy bear. They gave me list of meds that are safe during pregnancy and my records to take to my OB doctor. I can't believe I made it to actually graduate from the infertility clinic! I waited to schedule my first OB appt until after this u/s because every time in previous FET I had scheduled it I had to call and cancel due to miscarrying.
I had my first OB appointment on Thursday 4/6 and can I just say Dr. Nick Denson is wonderful! They did a quick u/s to reassure us and we saw the heart beating away and then we discussed a plan. He told me he'd be happy to see me every 1-2 weeks to ease my worry through first trimester due to my long history of trying and losses. He said we'd probably do a cervical cerclage (stitch) around 14-16 weeks and stay on progesterone through pregnancy as a preventative pre-term labor measure. He also referred me to Dr. Spencer a perinatal doctor that comes to IF occasionally (who happens to be Dr. Conway's my IVF doctors husband) to see if he has any other ideas or advice on when best placement time for cervix stitch would be etc.
So I have another appointment next Friday 4/14 to check up on baby and reassure myself and will see Dr. Spencer 4/18.
I have been a little nauseated but not to the point of throwing up, sore boobs, tired, lots a peeing, lots of bloat and the gas...Oh boy! (hands over eyes emoji)
I am taking this one day at a time and Praying this is finally our time. Finally.
We appreciate more than you know your continued thoughts and prayers and love.
I especially want to thank my amazing angel family that has helped me with Grayson, made dinners, cleaned my house, grocery shopped, and emotionally supported us. I truly feel they are my serving angels and I am forever grateful to their sacrifice to our family. Cue the tears. We are so blessed.